For you

My Dearest SugarBear,
I should have been doing this from the day you were born, but it just occurred to me to start it now when you are just over 8 months old!

I hadn't believed you were possible for me. You are a true blessing from God. Your Daddy and I love each other a great deal and you are the product of that love, My Sweet. When I look at your sweet face and shining smile I am completely captivated. I am in awe of the perfection that is you. All of your beautiful toes wiggle, all of your sweet fingers grasp and grab. Your little legs and arms wave and dance. Your little tummy so round and smooth. I just want to snuggle you all the time.

You have accomplished so much in such a short time. You came into this world 5 weeks early and tiny as can be. 5 pounds is frighteningly small for a mommy, by the way. It broke my heart to have to hook you up to the bililight instead of hold you in my arms that entire first week. Your first smile at just a couple of weeks old, though some tried to tell me it was gas--I knew better, was all for me. When your daddy got home you shared one for him too. We positively glowed with delight in you.

Before I knew it my time at home with you was up and I had to go back to work. You were 8 weeks old. We were blessed to find Grace to keep you while we worked. She has been so wonderful to our family but especially, SugarBear, to you. I know that you are safe and loved when I can't be there with you. You are growing alongside her beautiful daughter, Iris and basking in the energy and excitement of her delightful son, Isaiah. I do thank God that I am a teacher though and can be home with you in the summers. From the day I went back to work I have been counting down the days until I can be home with you again to see you grow and change first hand everyday!

You have learned to do so much in such a short time that I am so excited to see what this summer will bring as well! So far you have held your head up all alone, smiled, cooed, laughed, babbled, learned to fake a cough if it got you attention, eat solid foods, sit up all by yourself, yelled, and also now stand while holding on to something or someone. I am overjoyed at each accomplishment. Yesterday you even scolded Cody when he kept getting in our way while walking through the house. You are now learning to look for things when they are taken from your sight or if you are moved a little to look around things. Daddy was playing with you last evening with this! It is such fun to do new things with you.

You have scared me with bronchiolitis and frustrated me with teething, but through it all I have loved you. All the struggles only make me want to love you harder, if that is at all possible.

Some things we have learned about you in these few months:
-You love us! When I speak you seek me out, you smile and talk to me all the time. My favorite is when you grab both sides of my face and gaze into my eyes while you talk to me. When Daddy comes home you have the biggest smile on your face for him! Your first word was even "DaDa!"
-You love your big brother. When Jonathan is with us you always want to be where you can see him. When he holds you, you always try to look at him. Even when he was awkward holding you, you seemed perfectly comfortable and trusting in him. By the way, he thought you looked like an alien when you were still inside of me. He doesn't think that anymore!
-You HATE peas, but LOVE pears. You have now developed a distrust for the solid foods I try to feed you after my final attempt at giving you something that had peas in it. I am sorry. The books all said I should try at least 10 times before we determined that you didn't like something. I gave up. You have made it perfectly obvious that you don't like them at all! Pears are a shoe-in though. You simply can't resist them or anything that has them in it!
-You are so social and such a flirt! You seek out the girls wherever we are and "work the crowd" with them. You will peer at them around me, then hide your face and peek again. When that wears out for you, you give HUGE smiles and start talking to them. You are friendly to the guys, but the ladies get your full charm!
-You are loving. You have already tried to give kisses occasionally, but you do love to snuggle with me or Daddy.
-You will have more of my chatty personality than your Daddy's quietness. You talk all the time!
-You are smart. You are learning things so quickly!
-You are stubborn. You CAN do many things, but are choosing not to (like rolling over). You also know what you want and stick to it, ie. NO PEAS, won't go to sleep without mommy or daddy even though you can and have done so often before, you don't give up when you are trying to do something new or difficult...
-Your smile is infectious and fills your whole face from your chin dimple to your eyes. No one can resist smiling back when you smile at them! A room brightens when you light up your face like that!

I just can't express how special you are. I hope that this journal of notes will help you to realize how much you are loved and give you something to look back to as you grow up.

Love,
Mommy